I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
i think i should save myself the $200 for a prom dress. i mean why bother. its just going to be covered in vodka/jizz/and puke by the end of the night.
I was eating her out when she coughed, I just swallowed a bright red blood clot
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I just made Jack Daniels snow cones.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Certain restrictions may apply. Common side effects of sex with me include unbridled joy, a healthy glow, soreness and the inability to walk for short to long amounts of time. If any of these side effects occur please consult your physician, so he/she can prescribe me a "high-five".
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
Randomize
