We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
