The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
also, I think I lit my hair on fire when I got home..
Randomize
