i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
Shit, I may have left some acid in your bathroom last night. Has he been in there lately.
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Not my man #1 and if he likes it then he should put a title on it. Till then the gates of hell. Aka my vagina are open for entrance.
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
I think I just legit sprained my wrist from holding myself up while giving a blow J. God dammit come already
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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