Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
He had bigger boobs than me last night and we both weren't wearing a bra so it was a fair judgement
ALWAYS CAPS LOCK. IS THERE EVER A SITUATION THAT DOES NOT CALL FOR CAPS LOCK? NO.
Sexting? Sexting in caps lock seems rather unnerving.
I WANT YOUR BODY AND I WANT IT NOW.
I rest my case.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I've got to stop being so hungover that I puke in the fine establishments of this glorious town.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I was left to my own devices with nothing to do but drink
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