is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
:( I miss blowjobs.
This is probably the strangest conversational segue we've ever had.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
the bank didn't screw up, i spent 150$ at mcdonalds last night
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
I've been getting a lot of emails from patron lately for being a great customer. Is that awesome, or should I start thinking about seeking help?
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