Heard it's your birthday. I can't send pictures, but go ahead and imagine my balls.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Best walk of shame ever. Not only did I not remember his name or the fact that we fucked, they all watched as I tried to get into 3 cars that werent mine
Oh and I threw up on myself...
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
started to yawn and threw up hamburger helper instead. awesome night.
I feel like I've wasted too many painkillers on hangovers
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
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