So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I'm not sober enough to be having a conversation about a rap she wrote in Spanish about public safety
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
Another Sunday, another 100 chicken nuggets
How bad is the voicemail?
You graded my boobs.... C minus. Asshole.
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
I feel like your personal Bdsm barbie...
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