Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Do you think my bosses would frown upon Jameson with breakfast on this holiest of days?
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Jesus christ. I put you on speaker when you called me last night and you told me to brush my teeth with a dick.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
Randomize
