evidently tequilla and lady gaga make me flirt and grind shamlessly with other men infront of my boyfriend.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
dude, she masturbates with a ken doll.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Oh please not the Easy Cheese again. That was weird.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
Randomize
