I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Whenever ur ready we need breakfast and a psychic.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Plus apparently whenever one of her friends loses their virginity they get a party with a funfetti cake which I found funny
It would be celebrated in history as "the orgasm heard round the world"
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
eating jello out of the cup. with my face. while on the toilet. i am at my lowest.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
