I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I'm thinking we can stop tracking my sex life by the hotels I've hooked up in and instead use bar bathrooms I've gotten head in.
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
Pretty sure encouraging you to sleep with 2 different girls while keeping you in the good graces of both has lost me the ability to call myself a woman. But that's just the kind of friend I am; dedicated.
We split an eighth of shrooms and went ice fishing. It didn't get weird until I caught one and we both started crying.
I just rolled a blunt at my desk. Happy early Friday!
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
My life is pants optional.
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