so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
she's crying while babbling "all i do is win"
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Whoever decided to wrap my shins in duck tape owes me new leg hair.
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
