This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
I'm driving to work with an ice pack on my vagina. how was your weekend?
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
I can't cum and do my makeup at the same time.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
I am too hungover to address any of this right now, every time i move it feels like i'm being bitch slapped by the hand of God
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
And don't try to lose a condom in me tonight. My vagina is not a storage compartment where you can just leave something and try and use it again later in the week.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Randomize
