Leave Me Alone
At least least me cry on your voice mail
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
My professor just gave us a margarita recipe.
Why?
Because, and I quote, he "wants to give us the tools to succeed in life."
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
How do you make a Facebook status saying how much you fucking hate yourself without being aggressive enough for people to worry about your safety
Cuz that's where I'm at
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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