Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
Found a waterbottle filled with a bloody mary in my purse this morning. Blacked-out me is always trying to help hungover me, it's so cute.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I was on my way at Dorito Smoothie
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Did you really lure me out of the bar with a blond holding a dunkin donuts bag? Well played sir, well played.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
no. i discovered the *exact* amount of drugs i need to do to understand calculus.
You peed in my kitchen, while crying and insisting my floor was a toilet.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
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