margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
just so you know, your brother isn't driving home wasted tonight. he is, instead, in my dorm shower screaming about rubbing his butt with my loofah; thought you would be proud
At least he could have found a MILF, she's a dbl bagger. No wonder he goes to counseling.
Yeah..you can't spell Prozac without Zac(h).
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Oh, and i love you too. Im just a selfish dick who had to talk about myself first
This is what we do on Thursday nights. Spray tans, blunts and drawing pictures of cats.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
We are gonna sacrifice to and pray to every god in this world that he doesn't find out about her sleeping with his old roommate.
No one parties "Full Karen". She once broke a couple up at the bar, ate the girl out in the bathroom and took the guy home.
dude I don't even care if I'm getting catfished the point is I'm going to get laid. hot bitch, fat bitch, skanky bitch, i don't care my penis is having an adventure tonight regardless
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
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