break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
He likes bondage and spanking and shit.
Oh, so "normal" kinky not "I wanna pee on people" kinky. I can handle that.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
Randomize