We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
What's the protocol for seeing the two girls you've been sleeping with in the store WHILE buying condoms?
3some
You're right, stupid question.
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
WHAT IS PROPER BONG ETIQUETTE FOR WHEN YOU'RE ALONE IN YOUR BATHTUB AND CRYING?
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
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