how hairy? two words: wookie tits
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Homeless guy on the metro is drinking beer out of a coke bottle. Hello friend.
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
Can I pee and smoke my bong at the same time or is that like eating on the toilet
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
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