I went out, and slept with my sunglasses on
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
I succsesfully kept my nipples in my dress all night. Even when I got in a fight. I was made for the bar.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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