Tell her she can't have a vagina
she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
When my girlfriend drinks sangria it's like winning the vagina lottery
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
you were carrying around a glass of vodka telling everyone it was Russian water
soo I had sex last night and he wore a condom, pulled out sans condom. we looked everywhere and couldnt find it, even in my vag. so Im in the library at school and I googled it and it gave me "gentle digging" techniques, and sure enough, found it. ew. I'll be purchasing Plan B after class.
I think you blew our chances when you yelled "YOU SLUTS COMING TO THE TITTIE BAR?" in their face
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Ummm so I'm at the hospital and just heard some guy get tazed......twice.
He drunk texted me what I think is two snails fucking on a mushroom. Is "you sick bastard" too mild a rejection?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
He got up after sex and said "is it wrong if I say happy Mother's Day?"
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