the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
if i were to get pulled over right now, the only thing i would be guilty of is listening to 90's Mariah Carey
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
some kid lit a j in the bar tonight. i was in awe of both his boldness and the severe beatdown he received moments later
well at least you didn't have your nipples chewed last night
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
he woke up this morning, drunk as fuck, butt ass naked, and he had left grandmas gun on the counter and doesn't know why.
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
Randomize
