Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
There is a man on the balcony beside me who claims he is a triceratops. He roared and asked me for a cigarette, telling me he'd eat me if I refused. I love college.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
Pretty sure even her dog was surprised when I got that blow job.
He just dragged himself across the floor on his back claiming to be "the swiffer" help
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
I burned myself with a joint twice in one sitting I have to say that's a new record for the least number of times I have hurt myself while smoking.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Randomize
