i woke up under my mattress pad with him laying naked next to me and his wwjd bracelet on my nightstand.
nice, that's exactly what jesus would do.
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
i'm smoking hookah in a kayak. how did this happen.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
If he can forgive your lousy blowjobs, you can ignore his terrible driving.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
pizza hut and my weed lady just showed up at the same time. I feel 22 again.
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Thank you for stopping me from getting a butt tattoo. That was a good call.
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