dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
I don't know how, but he made a bong out of a hamster wheel. To say I am impressed is an understatement.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I just slow jerked to the titanic theme song, i dont think theres enough alcohol in the state to get me over her tonight
Im just using you for your dick and your superb survival skills if needed.
i was so high i thought the horse on my poster was running
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
When breakfast is a rum &coke at the office Christmas party you know it's gonna be a good day
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
I'm glad I didn't see Grandma stumbling drunk and peeing herself...it would be like seeing my future.
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Your friend was nice but you didn't have to bang her in my kitchen...just sayin.
Randomize