whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
scratched cornea got me an eyepatch and a blowjob from a girl with a thing for pirates
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
You guys I wore sweatpants to work today because I simply forgot to put on real pants and I had a weed brownie and a juice box for breakfast. I am not ready for parenting.
I mean when you laced a shot with $200 worth of cocaine I could see why you'd be mad when somebody drops it
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
