It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
At one point during the moaning he reminded me of Forrest Gump
Mattress luging...It's a long story.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I totally just stopped for a booty call on the way to my parents for easter....good friday is an understatement
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
And I had on a penis ring on the whole time at dinner. And I ate veal...
There is a huge fucking spider in my bathroom....I can just burn our apartment down right? What do you need me to grab?
I love how u said nothing about the sidewalk sex but refused shower sex
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
