It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
That chick who made out with a door is here. Want her number??
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
True strength comes from lack of pants
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
enjoying your night?
do dogs like to salsa?
I dont know if that answers my question or not
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
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