i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
my professor just said "the power of the situation"
drink
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
The amount of guys I've turned down for you is disgusting... You better love me.
Try to fuck my roomie AND steal my slippers: you are no longer my favorite cousin.
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
Randomize