We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Disney World has no open container laws. Ohmygod this place is even cooler than it was when I was ten.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
Oh hey. I left my beer there. Beer is more important than my pride. I want to pick that up.
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
I’m good. I learned that a guy ate the mushrooms that were growing out of his toilet, so there’s that.
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