five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
Just saw a guy at the gas station legitimately dressed in exactly what my costume was last night. Fuck his life.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
then she stuck her tongue in my ass
I thought we were talking about reason you aren't going to marry her?
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
well shes beginning to earn a reputation as "the girl who tries to bone her hook ups in the ass with a pickle"
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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