I feel like I'm in dance class right now
Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Chicago was legit, ate some badass pizza and gave a cig to a crackhead..its all i thought it would be
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Fun fact: female penguins have sex in exchange for pebbles to build nests. I now know what im being for halloween
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
You broke the end off a wine bottle, ran outside and screamed "FOR NARNIA!!"
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Drinking Patron always ends with me puking or receiving anal. So make your move when I start ordering it.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
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