I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
so I called to to smoke and you didn't pick up so I smoked and now I'm a race car
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
Randomize
