My goal for the party is to get everyone in a diaper. Reasonable?
She went into the basement and sang to my cat for three hours....she actually has a beautiful voice....
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
Still drunk, heading to class.
It's 3 a.m. Dude
Doesn't mean I'm not at my desk. Ill wait.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
Randomize