dude i'm inner monologue high
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
I just typed in random letters on his address bar... 5 out of the 6....a porn site was in the drop down list hahahahaha get a life bro.
I want to break up with him.....but he has a george forman grill...like I need that
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
The only pictures I have are of me being stoned or me looking like a man, which do you prefer?
I can say with 87% certainty that i received one of the world's five greatest blow jobs since the Coolidge administration on Saturday night.
you know i have almost 1500 fb friends but not ONE drunk booty call?
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Some guy just hit on me and then said, well you look too young to ride the emotional roller coaster and guestured to his dick.
We got drunk and crashed a fifty year old woman's birthday party for the food. Whoops.
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
STAY IN YOUR APARTMENT. DONT GO TO SAFEWAY TO BUY CONDOMS. DONT GO TO THE VAN.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
wait he has a twin??? which one did you fuck
yes
Randomize