In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
It was like being fucked by the god of thunder, he gained power from the storm. I took a Plan B because I don't think regular birth control will stop Thor's sperm.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
I didn't ask for a picture of your soft dick.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
He showed up in a Prius. I didn’t even wanna.... So I left.
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