just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
I am not getting you a goat.
Fair enough. I am not going out with you. The goat was not negotiable.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
In a few weeks I'll be a beautiful butterfly and me and my cat will have to repopulate the earth. WE WILL REBUILD!!
Randomize
