drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
If we had kids we couldn't come home, get high and watch porn together. And that's like the only reason I get up in the morning
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Randomize
