Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
I told him that he is like a snow storm I never know when he is coming, how many inches I will get, or how long it will last
I woke up and she had washed, dried, folded my clothes, cooked me breakfast, and had started cleaning my room
haha, you sure you didnt fuck your mom?
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
Fair warning: We've transformed the living room into a giant tent.
I got Pilsbury cinnamon rolls for us to have tomorrow, but I don't have the willpower to leave them in my fridge overnight, so I am eating them all and getting us more in the morning
I love you more by the minute
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Seriously. Texted me 4 times and that didn't wake me up so he nicely called and left a voicemail saying he WOULD call me 8 times. So when he called back I answered.
WHY WERE YOU COOKING NAKED?
WHY WERE YOU SLEEPING ON MY COUCH?
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
As your boyfriend, I'm gonna congratulate you on winning that fist fight. But as a cop, I have to tell you to not do that again.
Randomize