Do you still have your period?
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
i offered her breakfast shots. she politely declined.
I'm going to be blunt here. I don't actually care what you're doing tonight. I just need to know if I need to shave or not.
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
Beer and tomahawks! Not gonna end well!
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
They sleep with other people as long as there is no oral. Logic and reason were thrown out the window a long time ago with them.
Who the fuck watches Jessica jones and thinks I need to call a past fling?
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
HIDE THE INFLATABLE PENIS
Randomize
