He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I couldn't open my car door and for a second I thought they were taking me to an intervention circle.
drunk enough to drink jager bombs out of a bowl on the kitchen floor.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
When we were finished I asked him how long it had been since he'd cum that hard. He thought really hard for a while before telling me his brain forgot how years worked.
He used the ring emoji and we've gone out four times. What is my life.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
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