Were we dating when my roommates and I had the 'everyone gets laid' part?
Ya
I used to kick so much ass
I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
The first thing they saw when they walked in was all four of our std test's hangin on the fridge....i'd be worried if they didn't think we were sluts
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I can't relate, I like my boobs roaming free like a wild animal, and I occasionally let them devour small children
I'm not saying I would have to be high to sleep with him. I'm just saying it would probably help.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
But I'm currently thinking of all my bad decision making last night and giving myself a time out.
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
what the fuck happened to the tacos
Randomize
