i got a blow job in the bathroom during intermission at the hockey game. i'm pretty sure i made Canada proud.
He sang nursery rhymes to my vagina to get me to have sex with him..
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Went to the elf storage building to help him get his old dresser. Found his brother's stash in the drawer and ended up passed out w him on the mattress in there instead.
I can't turn off my feet"
Then again, he has huge mansions.
*manboobs.
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I came over to get dick...not to watch you vacuum....at 2 AM
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
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