Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
meet me or not, i'm out of control
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
Do you think I should make him wait for my responses or do you think sophomore have no concept of time like dogs?
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
Right now I'm in a club where they are passing out glow in the dark dildos by the dozen. I don't think my life will ever get weirder than it is at this moment.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Plus my dignity needs a night alone with me.... Oh that's right. I lost it last night
Drunk in my hotel room, eating taco bell, and crying at Nicki Minaj's life story.
This is why I keep you in my life.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
I just want to get high and watch Dr. Pimple Popper.
Randomize
