is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
she's bipolar. she literally has TWO facebook pages. one for each personality. this. bitch. is. crazy.
I think the camel was justified in biting me.
Tomorrow is Have Sex and Climb A Mountain Day. We have amazing dates.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I didn’t spend $100 for a wax to sit here and listen to you FT your brother to complain about how bad the Jets are.
Randomize