Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
The dog just shocked himself by peeing on Christmas lights, should I have saw that coming?
I mixed Jack with hot chocolate. This may be the best or worst idea ever. I have yet to find that out
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
I am in no place to make rational decisions, but right now i want you inside me
Randomize
