I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
i just stepped in cum. i hate you.
Thats what happens when you don't swallow.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
We drove past his house blaring "Like a virgin" in the middle of the day. pretty sure he heard.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
I like that our conversation ended with "im gonna go get pregnant goodnight"
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I've finally given up enough on finals week to wear the same shirt three days in a row, because I didn't take my hoodie off for the first two.
I found one of those wine glass confetti bits in my ass crack.
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
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