we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Hate you missed the after party, I was covered in dish soap gliding bare assed down a slip n slide at 6:30 this morning
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
It's always awkward in the office the day after your boss sends you a dick pic.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Randomize
