I was so drunk last night I wanted to download a Busta Rhymes album.
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
Everyone was trying to get you to do a keg stand but you refused & instead declared you could do it yourself, crouched on the keg in your 6 inch heels, leaned over, and gave yourself one.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I told him no rough stuff and he immediately bit my ass. Who the fuck does that?
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
What's the world record for number of orgasms reached on ones birthday? Asking for a friend.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
