I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
Just met someone from Jersey. No fist pumps or jagerbombs. Kind of disappointed...
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
If I wake up with an unknown penis in me one more time I am literally going to press charges to the makers of tequila.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Scary. I hope people take me seriously. Maybe I should black out less to be sure
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
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